February 13, 2008

The Limbaugh Loop-de-Loop

Rush Limbaugh is an easy target. I wont go into the volumes of Rush-bashing that could be, and probably have been, written, but this piece perked my interest.

It has been no secret that throughout the Republican presidential nomination process, most conservative media figureheads have avoided praising John McCain, or in most cases, openly deriding him.

Rush Lint-bag: "I’m here to tell you, if either of these two guys get the nomination, it’s going to destroy the Republican Party, it’s going to change it forever, be the end of it.”

James Dobson: "I am convinced Sen. McCain is not a conservative, and in fact, has gone out of his way to stick his thumb in the eyes of those who are."

The American Conservative: "A militarist suffering from acute narcissism and armed with the Justin Raimondo Bush Doctrine is not fit to be commander in chief."

Ann Coulter: "Nominating McCain is the gesture of a desperate party."

Other examples abound. The banshees of Right Blogistan seem to have unanimously declared him a heretic for his liberal stances on several issues including immigration and torture. For his most heinous crimes of COMPASSION and DECENCY, he has been declared unacceptable for the Republican Nomination. Yet despite the venom coming from the major right-wing media outlets, McCain seems to have struck a chord with the republican base, so far winning 827 pledged delegates to Huckabee's 217, all but guaranteeing himself the nomination.

But the Rushbo wont be beaten that easily. His epic failure to destroy the candidacy of John McCain is not, in fact, indicative of the gradual slide into pottering irrelevancy of the Hate-Moguls of the Far-Right. Oh no. It is yet another example of the Solid Gold Mic in action. It is proof that the Voice of Limbaugh is heard and heeded in the far corners of the Conservative Universe (which is, btw, 6,000 yrs young). The accendency of McCain, despite the sweat and swears of Limbaugh, does not at all indicate that ol' Rush is an outdated, intellectually stunted, creatively decrepit, blowhard who hasn't had an original thought in a decade. It instead points to the deft political maneuvers that that wiley MC is still capable of, able to always dance a step ahead of the Conventional Wisdom, and three steps ahead of the Left.

*Rush sees his opportunity, and...*

See ya'll! Ol' boy Rush was right again! Haha, he actually wanted McCain to win, thats why he toiled and ranted for months about McCain's conservative shortfalls and potential to end the Dominance of the Right, because he just knew that if he pretended to NOT like McCain, the "liberal-bias" in the media against the Prophet of Conservatism would overcompensate somehow and project McJohn into the lead. You silly peasants, its no wonder you were seduced and controlled by the steely-strong webs of Rush's Web.

See Mom?!?! I won! I really did win again Mom! I promise...

Or something. Somebody check the medicine cabinet, see if the poor bastard's been in there too much lately, or maybe not enough, hard to tell these days...

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GestapoParrot said...

Its funny to watch Rush fall into ambiguity as his party loses a lot of respect it once held.